Harrison has officially took his first steps on his own! He only manages it every now and then but he is so chuffed when he does it, he claps his hands. Although one draw back is that sometimes he puts his hands in the air as if he’s going to walk forward but instead he just falls straight back without bending his knees! So we are not completely there yet but it really is just around the corner.

On another note it has been just wonderful to see Emily and Harrison really playing together lately. They have discovered this game of chase, whereby they each have a trike or ride on toy and follow each other around at high speed. Its so funny to see Harrison stop and look around to see where Emily is. He is definitely starting to communicate more clearly and let us know what he wants and doesn’t want and sometimes that can be in the form of very loud shouting!

ALso I am trying to keep it together since my the start of my day has changed from about 7am to 5am with Harrison wanting to get up, eat and play. Its a real killer and its taking some getting used to. I have to say that it doesn’t spur me on to go to bed early like it should so its no wonder I’m wrecked!

Twelve and a half months on and I have finally stopped breastfeeding Harrison. I honestly felt like it was never going to come to an end but after a few mornings of frantic feeds and him biting my face I decided enough was enough. I can hardly believe I managed to feed him for so long. I actually don’t feel that emotional about stopping. I suppose its because I fed him for much longer than planned so I am ready for it.

The only draw back is that, instead of bringing him into our bed in the morning between 5.30 and 6, to doze a bit longer, I now have to jump out of bed and bring him downstairs to be fed as quickly as possible. He is so grumpy in the morning and shouts at the top of his lungs until he is fed! He carries on this shouting lark quite often throughout the day until he gets what he wants. This is generally food (he basically lives on various toast or sandwich based lunches and mashed potato & veg dinners!) but can also be his determination to climb stairs whenever he sees them or grabbing your fingers and telling you which direction he wants to walk.

I am frazzled. This boy knows what he wants!

Its hard to believe he is one already. The time has flown in, sometimes I wish I could get off the roller-coaster and take it all in. Its hard to appreciate all the little things and just how precious they are when everything goes by so quickly.

To think that once upon a time I would’ve been horrified (harsh but true I’m afraid) at the thought of having a little boy. Yet here he is, my adorable boy and I love him so much. I wouldn’t change him for the world and having a boy hasn’t turned out to be that bad after all. He is just the loveliest little boy I know, cute, funny, handsome and so good natured – lets hope it stays this way!

We had a family tea for him today, nice and quiet – well not totally quiet but hey at least there wasn’t 16 toddlers creating chaos! There were definitely a few issues with Emily. This is the first time Harrison has had a day just for him and I could tell she found it hard. She wanted to open the presents and play with his toys, so it was a big learning curve for her that not everything is centred around her. She has been so good with Harrison since he was born and I suppose we were bound to see some sulky behaviour at some point so we can’t complain and especially as generally she is just brilliant with him.

Anyway I am knackered! SO Happy First Birthday my gorgeous little boy! x

Harrison is so close to walking and is so frustrated that he can’t just get up and go. He is trying his best to get about and although he is not crawling really (unless you count the dragging himself like a wounded soldier approach) he just wants to be on his feet constantly.

This is pretty back breaking hard work! He just grabs hold of your fingers so he can stand up and off he goes and he certainly knows where he is heading too. So we are temporarily human walking frames! The past couple of days he has worked out that he can get himself onto his feet himself by pulling himself up various levels of furniture then hanging on to either the TV stand or the radiator (so its square eyes and burny fingers! I have turned the radiator off just to be sure).

The scary discovery he has made is that the stairs are just perfect for climbing and just the right height. I heard him huffing and puffing in the hall and went out to find him on the first step, so I stood there to see what he would do and he just carried on climbing up another 4! So the stair gate has to go on, I can see we have a mischief on our hands!

Finally yesterday I moved the cot from our room into the back room, after having about 2 hours sleep the night before. I had reached the end of my tether (again!) and I couldn’t spend another night of interrupted sleep. So I hoisted the cot in one piece over our bed, along the landing and into the back room – its amazing what you can achieve when you are desperate!

So Harrison had his first night on his own. I did feel a little sad, but I was comforted by the thought of the possibility of somehow regaining my nights sleep. That and being able to put the light on to get changed for bed and actually read too! He wasn’t too keen at first but eventually he fell asleep and although he cried a few times in the night, I didn’t go into him and he eventually went back to sleep. So as far as Harrison is concerned the first night went well, I even managed to go a night without feeding him, and I think thats only happened once before since he was born!

Unfortunately for me though, Emily woke twice in the night. Once having a bad dream which I settled her from and then later she came in and woke me up for snuggles! Bloomin typical! I could’ve screamed. At least its a start though and I am very happy with how things went. Fingers crossed…